Doctor Who - Pyramid At The End Of The World (2019)

This is like the black sheep of everything I've written (if that doesn't draw you in I don't know what will)

It was published in the 'One More Lifetime - A You And Who Miscellany' but even now re-reading it I think its a bit muddled and I'm not sure that I managed to get across what I was thinking onto paper...

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Pyramid At The End Of The World

Since the return of the show, most Doctor Who episodes I manage to watch on the day of broadcast, either ‘live’ or slightly afterwards when kids are in bed or I know there are going to be no distractions. It’s become a thing that when I watch Doctor Who I tend not to speak for the duration of the episode (although it’s rare that anyone will watch with me), thus allowing myself being absorbed into it, taking in all the details, the Easter Eggs and nods to fandomI imagine I’m not the only one, I’m sure many fans have habits or quirks when sitting to watch their favourite show

With ‘Pyramid At The End Of The World’, my viewing of episode had to wait. I couldn’t watch it on the Saturday evening as I was attending the ‘British Soap Awards’ as the guest of one of my closest and oldest friends, Paul (Liam) Fox, and at the episodes scheduled start time of 19:45 I was chatting to and having my photo taken with none other than David Bradley (I know this was at this time as my phone tells me!) For me meeting David, and earlier in the evening getting a hug off and photo taken with Bonnie Langford were the highlights of my evening despite being surrounded by 100’s of ‘talented’ and probably more ‘famous’ faces

So it came to be on the Sunday morning, still a little hungover and feeling fuzzy, basking in the afterglow, I sat down on the sofa to watch the previous nights episode… 

Except I didn’t, not really. 

It was on, but I can’t actually remember that much about it other than thinking afterwards that Tony Gardner was wasted in such a ‘small’ role and potentially would have been better playing a reoccurring character

For the 46 mins of the episode, and a few more after until my battery stared to die, I was looking at my Facebook, reading peoples comments on the pictures I’d posted from the night before, many recognising the likes of ‘Ian Beale’ and ‘Steve McDonald’ but not ‘Mel’ or ‘Solomon’ / the would be ‘William Hartnell’. 

Only paying an occasional glance to the TV, I read, I tweeted, I uploaded to Instagram… that said I’m not an autograph hunter or celeb selfie stalker, I’m fortunate that I have opportunities in life where I have worked with people who are in the public eye and have old friends that ‘live’ in that world. 

Sitting here several months on, I’ve not rewatched ‘Pyramid At The End Of The World’ or even the following weeks ‘Lie Of The Land’ despite owning the DVD Boxset and rewatching the rest of the season… to be honest the thought ‘I should rewatch…’ has never even entered my consciousness

Why? because they didn’t grip me on first showing and I didn’t enjoy them

So that got me thinking what kind of ‘fan’ I am… I have all the DVD’s, all the Target Books, a number of ‘non fiction’ books, I read every issue of Doctor Who Magazine… 

I regularly listen to Radio Free Skaro; the ‘Who’s He’ Podcast; Flight Through Entirety; and of course the Blue Box Podcast… but that said, I don’t spend every spare hour searching out interviews online, I don’t have a burning desire to go to conventions or to cosplay… ?

Does this make me a heratic?

Does this mean I’m not a ‘true’ Doctor Who fan

Should I be willing to rewatch every episode at any opportunity and be prepared to defend them to people who criticise the show

No… 

For me Doctor Who is something that’s been with me since I was old enough to watch television and make a decision of what I wanted to watch but not knowing why

It allowed flights of fantasy through my teenage years through the Target Books and various incarnations of Doctor Who Weekly/Monthly

In later years, when things have sometimes been tough it’s given me something to lose myself in and comfort meIt allowed me to a ‘cool Uncle’… passing my VHS tapes to nephews as I replaced them with DVD’s

And more recently it’s given me something to pass on to my youngest son, something for us to share as well as our joint love of football and music

Whilst some will have different views on what fandom is and how it can be measured… whether on pounds / dollars spent, number of conventions attended or autographs collected for me it just comes down to the love of the show and what it means to the individual

For me, for every ‘Pyramid At The End Of The World’ there is a ‘Horror of Fang Rock’ or ‘Earthshock’ which I’d rather watch… for someone else thought this could have been their first story and one which they’d prefer to watch over and over

At the end of the day, we’re all different shapes and sizes, all have different ways of doing things and thinking, but the great thing about Doctor Who is that it’s all inclusive… we may not all like every episode… but we will the next, or the one after that…

So I’m happy, I am a Doctor Who fan… and that’s not going to change anytime soon

My Mum, Who and I (2016/17)

This piece was originally written in 2016 and revised in 2017 for a project called 'You And Who's Company' which studied the your relationship / love of Doctor Who and how it linked to another person...

It was published in an a 2019 volume "One More Lifetime: A You and Who Miscellany"



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My Mum, Who and I

I was born in the winter of 1969 in the months between ‘The War Games’ and ‘Spearhead From Space’ (or if you’re a comic strip enthusiast, during ‘The Night Walkers’ serial in TV Comic). I’m the fourth of four children with a gap of seven years and the result, allegedly, of a Royal British Legion reunion earlier that year (or possibly a power cut)

My earliest memories are beige tinted, backed with floral wallpaper and extensively feature the Wombles and my mother searching for candles under the kitchen sink as the electric had gone off again (that’s condensing most of the early 1970’s into a couple of lines… I’m sure many people of a certain age can relate though!)

My first memories of Doctor Who come from the brief trailers shown after Grandstand on a Saturday afternoon. If I was lucky, the single black and white TV in the house hadn’t been switched over to ITV for ‘World of Wrestling’ or just off as no one was watching it (whilst BBC2 did exist I can’t remember it ever being watched)

Occasionally, I’d get to hear the first strains of the famous theme starting of the programme; however this was often a cue for my parents or an older sibling to come into the room to switch the TV off or over…

I vaguely remember Jon Pertwee being the Doctor. Not from the TV Show though, I remember him being on the back cover of my Mum’s ‘Baking Your Cake and Eating It’ book which she’d got from the Co-op (probably by collecting coupons)
My proper, earliest, bona fide, nailed on memory of Doctor Who on the TV though was the trail for ‘The Android Invasion’ where it’s revealed Styggron’s androids have weapons in their fingers. I remember this clearly as I immediately ran to the kitchen to tell my Mum who was cooking tea and asked if I could watch it, ‘No, it’s too scary for you, you’re only 5… maybe when you’re 6’ was the response

That Christmas my Mum must have felt sorry for me missing out on being allowed to watch the show as one of my presents was the ‘War of the Daleks’ board game. It was brilliant, small plastic Daleks, little cardboard Doctor’s in plastic stands… It was the best present ever (until I got a Palitoy ‘Millennium Falcon’ in 1982) but tragedy soon struck. I have long blamed my sister Cathy for what happened next but maybe it was actually a manufacturing fault… during the first play of the game the plastic middle section of the board was twisted (as in the rules of the game) and snapped off. I was inconsolable. My Mum took the game back to the shop to get it replaced only to find that this had been a common issue. They never got any more stock. Until the dawn of the Internet my only visual memory of the game was a photo taken that Christmas Day of me, my Mum and sisters settling down to play it in our beige floral living room.



Moving on a few months to August 1976, a holiday in Bournemouth (although I think it was only my parents and I there). Following an exhaustingly long train journey from Manchester  for whatever reason our first stop before the guesthouse was WH Smiths… and there it was, being sold off … ‘The Amazing World of Doctor Who’. I pleaded with my Mum to buy it with the rationale I’d been behaved for the previous six hours or so and it was raining (I always found that if I wanted something it was better to ask Mum so she could persuade my Dad if there was a chance he’d say no!)… She agreed and sent my Dad off to pay 50p or whatever for it.
That week I spent every opportunity to study the art (‘The Sinister Sponge’ still looks scary for what was essentially a kid’s publication) and learning what I could about the Doctor, Cybermen, Draconians etc

I was hooked… but it would be another year, when I was 7 before I was deemed old enough to watch an episode… although it was more by chance than design. That day was 11 August 1977… episode 2 of the repeat showing of ‘The Deadly Assassin’… Mum and Dad were outside chatting to my Uncle Ken who’d taken me out somewhere for the day and had left me in the living room to my own devices, the precedent was set, and from ‘The Horror of Fang Rock’ through until the last episode of ‘Trial of A Timelord’ I watched every episode on original broadcast. I remember that it was this day clearly, not only as the Internet tells me that the programme was repeated on this day but because I was bought a small ceramic hedgehog from wherever I’d been on the day out… I still have this and the date it was bought remains written on the underside for posterity
Actually, go back a bit; I tell a lie, I also missed Episode 2 of ‘Keeper of Traken’ in 1981 as I went to see Manchester United lose away at Leicester City. This in itself was memorable for the wrong reasons, not only was it the first ‘away trip’ I’d ever been on, not only did we lose but it was the first time I’d seen heavy handed police tactics in force as they boarded our Supporters Coach on arrival at the designated parking area, literally turned out everyone bags, resulting in carefully packed lunches, knitting and my copy of ‘The Monster Of Peladon’, which I’d bought with money saved up from Christmas, being kicked around the floor before being frogmarched into the ground. If I remember correctly United were 1-0 down by the time we got into the ground. As a result I’ve never liked the city of Leicester, and have always tried to avoid going there since.

But anyway, after 1977 I absorbed as much Doctor Who as I could, the day after my 8th Birthday my Mum took me on the bus to Wilmslow to Argos to get my ‘real’ birthday present’, a Denys Fisher ‘Talking Dalek’ (I got the Doctor and TARDIS that Christmas) and played with it all day until the batteries started to run out (much to peoples relief)… as a special treat I was able to have my ‘birthday tea’ whilst watching the final episode of ‘Image of the Fendahl’ (which is still one of my favourite stories)

To be honest Season 15 as a whole is still one of my favourites, even Giant Prawns and poor CSO could not spoil it for me. I wasn’t aware of the previous Seasons’ highs, wasn’t aware of the changes in Production Team from Hinchcliffe to Williams… it was just Doctor Who, and to my 8 year old self it was magical

In early 1979 we moved to the West Midlands. We lived a few miles from a main ‘town’ (Tardebigge being in between Redditch and Bromsgrove) so we had a mobile library van visit our ‘estate’ once a month. Not having a clue that ‘Target Books’ existed, let alone about release schedules, I was thrilled when I happened to find a battered copy of ‘Genesis of The Daleks’ to loan… I immediately asked for ‘any more Doctor Who’… the next month I was presented with well-thumbed hardback editions of ‘Web of Fear’; The Loch Ness Monster’; and ‘The Tenth Planet’… As much as reading the books I’d spend hours staring at the covers, admiring every aspect

The biggest revelation was to come a couple of months later… and it seems incredible now that I wouldn’t have been aware of or thought of this though after borrowing them from the mobile library… YOU COULD BUY THE DOCTOR WHO BOOKS!!!
Not only that… DOCTOR WHO WAS COMING TO BROMSGROVE!!!!

Little did I know either of these things though until Mum picked me up one day from school and announced we had to get a bus to the aforementioned town… It was like all my Christmas’s and Birthdays had come at once… there, upstairs in Preedy’s, a small, newsagents, come book / record shop, in full costume was Tom Baker surrounded by novelisation’s of stories I’d not yet heard of!

Unfortunately all this was happening ‘just before pay day’ … which I now know to be a genuine time of the month which tends to last for a couple of weeks, generally starting around the 14^th if you’re paid on the 1^st., I know this to be true as I now use it often myself in adult life. Being ‘just before pay day’ meant I was able to choose only one book to buy and be signed by the man himself… so, after what must have seemed like hours of deliberation and queuing to my Mum I chose the novelisation of Jon Pertwee’s ‘The Curse of Peladon’ for Tom Baker to sign…

Many years later, in 1997 I lost a number of my possessions in fire when the house I lived in was burnt down… this book, with Tom’s autograph, was one of the only Doctor Who related items I’d kept with me as I’d moved around with college and work, and was genuinely sorry to lose it. That Christmas though my brother presented me with a copy of Tom’s autobiography “Who on Earth Is Tom Baker”… opening it, I found it signed…

“To Iain, Sorry to hear about the fire, Love Tom Baker”

After the revelation that these books existed I then spend much of the following 4 years visiting scouring bookshops, now helped in part by Doctor Who Weekly / Monthly with news of what was ‘coming soon’ and having my appetite whetted by Jean-Marc Lofficier’s 1981 ‘Programme Guide’ to the stories not yet published. Actually it wasn’t’ just me… I’d give lists of books I was missing from my collection to my Mum, which she’d keep in her purse and she’d ‘look’ for these when she went shopping or was out for the day with my Dad.
Even now, every now and again I do go and read an ‘episode’ as put into words by the legend that is Terrence Dicks or browse thought an old issue of Doctor Who Weekly / Monthly, reading ‘The Iron Legion’ or ‘The Time Witch’ for an hour to relive my youth (it’s strangely more satisfying than watching an episode)

My Mum indulged my love of Doctor Who in the early 1980’s, always making sure I had the latest issue of Doctor Who Weekly or Monthly (to the point of calling the newsagents in nearby Aston Fields if it hadn’t arrived when expected), and making sure I had the Doctor Who Annual at Christmas.

My Mum also invented cosplay in 1980. Well, maybe not quite; from somewhere, I don’t know where, Mum got me a full size Tom Baker scarf… so when the local Church had a Summer Fete with a ‘fancy dress’ competition I was entered… wearing an old long coat borrowed from someone, my Dad’s trilby and my newly obtained scarf I was Doctor Who… I won the boys section easily (being the only entrant) and was ‘joint’ winner of the competition over all… I was thrilled, but miffed as thought I should have been outright winner.



Now I am older I can see why I had to share the prize… the only other participant in the competition was a 5 year old girl in a fairy outfit… (I say she was 5, she may have been older… but she was younger than I was). I’m fairly sure that I didn’t get the prize as either as whatever it was would have been ‘un-shareable’ so probably would be just been promised another Doctor Who novelisation the next time Mum went shopping

This wasn’t the only time my Mum got creative on my behalf. To earn what was probably a ‘making’ badge at Cubs… (It could possibly be ‘recycling’ now) we had to create something out of household rubbish. Most of my peers chose to make shields and swords and the like… I chose to make (or rather I got my Mum to make) K9… How hard could it be? A kitchen roll tube for a tail, a square box for the body with ‘K9’ drawn on with black marker pen, and egg box for a head… Peter Purvis would have been proud of me / my Mum… Sadly K9 didn’t last the evening that it was presented as one of my fellow Cubs managed to knock his head off with a well-aimed tennis ball… cue me walking home like a Marshman from ‘Full Circle’ carrying K9’s egg box head in my hand, dragging the box/body behind me… I did get the badge though!

At some point in 1984 my parents ‘rented’ a video recorder. (It seems strange now that people used to rent TV and video recorders rather than buying them outright). The first video my parents rented was ‘Police Academy’ at the cost of £8 for the weekend. We must have watched it 3 times to get our money’s worth…

I made sure I got our money’s worth out of the next video that got rented… during the first weeks of the summer holidays… ‘Revenge of The Cybermen’, I’m not sure if I’m correct but I am fairly sure I am, my Mum rented this for £10 for a whole week from ‘Owen Owen’ in Redditch, which if I remember correctly was a mainly a furniture and housewares store. Strange how they’d be renting VHS tapes, especially ones that may have had a ‘niche’ appeal… I must have watched it daily for that week, praying for the day when other stories would be released. (I think my family were praying also as I knew the edited compilation word for word)

Later that summer I travelled to Blackpool with my parents for a week, from what I can work out my last ‘family’ holiday with my parents. Other than record shops and bookshops the only thing of interest to me was the ‘Doctor Who Exhibition on Blackpool’s Golden Mile… After visiting the exhibition on probably the first day of our trip, somehow, my Mum managed to persuade the people that ran it to agree to me going back to dress up as a Cyberman and ‘promote’ the exhibition the following day.. And the day after, and the day after that… By the 3^rd day I was wearing David Bank’s Cyberleader costume that he’d worn in ‘Earthshock’ and ‘The Five Doctors’
















I did spend a couple of hours in the ‘Dalek’ but found that most passers-by thought it was amusing to kick it or try to push it into the wall… being a Cyberman was much more fun as you could scare the shit out of the parents who has seconds earlier been telling their kids that there was nothing to be scared of and it ‘wasn’t real’ as they walked passed you into long dark corridor at the start of the journey through the exhibition. I vividly remember grown men jumping out of their skin as a gloved Cyber-hand was placed on their shoulder…

The only other thing I remember about that holiday was using the same persuasion I’d used back in 1976 to get my ‘Amazing World Of Doctor Who’ book… even though Blackpool wasn’t as far as Bournemouth I persuaded my Mum to let me have my ‘pocket money’ to buy the Sex Pistols ‘Flogging A Dead Horse’ compilation … My Dad wasn’t too impressed when he saw the plastic turd on the back sleeve… I don’t think he appreciated the music much either. Buying that record would signal something else to come… something possibly bigger than my love of Doctor Who
I don’t want to give the impression that my Dad didn’t welcome or support my fixation with the TV Series, or ‘Doctor Bloody Who’ as he called it, or ‘this rubbish’ on the off chance he was in the same room as it was being broadcast. Years later, in the early 1990’s after he mentioned over tea that one of his colleagues had got BskyB Satellite TV in order to watch football, I enthusiastically explained that they were repeating early Doctor Who for the first time on UK Gold. For a couple of years, until I persuaded Dad to get it ourselves he would regularly buy packs of blank VHS video tapes so that his colleague ‘Nan’ could / would get up early every Sunday morning to record my favourite show. (Years later I asked why she hadn’t just set the timer, she explained they my Dad had told her how much being able to see these old shows meant to me and she feared missing even a few mins)
After leaving school and starting work in 1986 I met a few likeminded souls, some of whom had obtained 3^rd or 4^th generation VHS tapes of old episodes. As we only had one video recorder in the house I had to wait for my parents to be out at a Legion Meeting for the evening, or Saturday / Sunday afternoon when nothing else was on ‘main’ TV before I could watch. My parents were respective Presidents of the Men’s and Ladies Sections of Handforth Royal British Legion so thankfully their ‘official duties’ meant there were often occasions to do this. I remember watching copy of ‘The Ark’ with my Mum… I’m sure she was more taken with my enjoyment and enthusiasm watching a blurry 1960’s TV Show with a knackered horizontal hold and muffled sound than she was than with the actual show itself! 

If it wasn’t for my Mum’s encouragement I don’t know if my ‘obsession’ with Doctor Who would have lasted so long. I’m sure some people would think that it’s an unhealthy thing also, especially as until the relaunch of the show in 2005 being a ‘Doctor Who fan’ was derided by many, but I’ve formed many friendships and had opportunities arise due to it.

Within ‘fandom’ there is often the opinion that Doctor Who fans can’t also appreciate or wouldn’t be interested in things. For me that isn’t true, as I have just as many friends through a mutual love of legendary DJ John Peel, and the music he played and introduced to the masses and football, specifically Manchester United, where I have been a regular for over 30 years
Actually depending on how well people really know me they would say that outside of family my main obsessions are music and football. The first of these probably being the biggest as I spent many enjoyable years working in that area… which brings me to another reason for not liking Leicester! During 1996 a band I was managing were playing at the ‘Princess Charlotte’ a good little venue on the indie circuit. For some reason the locals decided we were from Liverpool rather than Manchester and taken a dislike to us. Our battered ‘Dodge’ tour bus was showered with bricks and bottles as we tried to load the gear back into it and Britz, our driver had to driver around the ring road which the venue sat on to pick up the various members of the band as they stumbled out of the venue or broke for cover.

Anyway, I digress… other than a couple of years in the late 1980’s when alcohol, the Madchester scene and going out became more of a thing I never have really lost my love of Doctor Who (the Sylvester McCoy era initially passed me by but I caught up via VHS). In my early 20’s my love for the show was fully reignited when a friend bought me ‘The War Games’ VHS for my 21^st birthday in late 1991. With me being a completest the collecting bug bit again, whether it be an official BBC release or a compilation recorded off UK Gold (and has only just recently finished over 27 years later with the release of ‘Shada’ BluRay)

It does seem a shame that since the birth of the Internet the art of searching things out and the joy of finding them has pretty much been taken away (unless you’re collecting them for the sake of owning the physical article… although a search on eBay is pretty much guaranteed for most things!)
It would have been unimaginable back in my youth when I started first collecting Target Books that I would one day have copies of all of them; plus issues of Doctor Who Weekly on my iPad and existing episodes on DVD and on a hard drive.

In more recent years my fandom has often been indulged by my friends…  Nikki, who knowing I was in London whilst Russell T Davies was signing ‘The Writers Tale’ in Manchester, drove from near Birmingham to get me a copy for my birthday (and ended up spending a few minutes discussing shoes with the aforementioned showrunner) and Phil who bought me a gold talking Dalek for Christmas in 2005 (both of which I still own).

Nikki also bought me a piece of Doctor Who autographed memorabilia… a page of the script from Tom Baker’s ‘Warriors’ Gate’ signed by Sylvester McCoy… that’s still on the wall.

My Mum passed away on 30^th April 2007. As anyone losing someone will know ‘normality’ goes out of the window for a period of time. It was mid-June before I got around to catching up on TV and getting back to ‘normal’. I sat down to watch the Doctor Who episodes I’d recorded (‘Evolution of The Daleks’ to ‘The Family of Blood’) in a marathon session on Sunday 3^rd June.

I’d never read any of the ‘New Adventures’, the programmes ‘wilderness years’ being a time when I was going out and doing other things, so wasn’t aware of the epilogue to the ‘Human Nature’ story…

Whilst apparently some of the sentiment was changed for the televised version, I found the ‘Remembrance Day’ scene completely heart-breaking but completely fitting, whist it was tying up the Paul Cornell’s story, for me personally it felt like my favourite show was also paying its own respects to my Mum too

Iain Key 2016/17

Northside Biography (2005)

Northside Biography

I wrote this in 2005 for the LTM Records re-release of 'Chicken Rhythms' released that same year

It was also used (with permission)  by 'Manchester and District Music Archive' 

https://www.mdmarchive.co.uk/biography/4264/Northside

In another world, Northside would have become the next great Factory band after Joy Division / New Order and Happy Mondays, going from strength to strength throughout the 1990s.

Sadly, in this world, it wasn't to be.

Right place, wrong time? Maybe.

When Chicken Rhythms was released during the summer of 1991 it was on the back of two fabulous singles. Shall We Take A Trip was banned by the radio but hovered on the outskirts of the Top 40 for several weeks. My Rising Star - a classic slice of Indie pop which still fills dancefloors to this day, and preceded Take 5.

So what happened? Where did it all go wrong?

1991 saw a shift in what was seen as cool. The Madchester scene, which had started around 5 years earlier and built up by the popular music press, was on the wane. No longer were New Fast Automatic Daffodils, Inspiral Carpets, The High, and the like guaranteed front pages, instead they were replaced by Nirvana, Soundgarden, Alice In Chains and countless other grunge acts from the Seattle area of the States.

But we're getting ahead of ourselves.

When I close my eyes, the future begins

Northside were formed at the beginning of 1989 in Blackley and Moston areas of North Manchester by Man United fan Warren 'Dermo' Dermody (vocals) and Man City supporter Cliff Ogier (bass). They were joined by Michael 'Upo' Upton (guitar) and Paul 'Wal' Walsh (drums) soon after.

At the time Moston was a typical working class area, suffering following Thatcher's recession, but with the arrival of 'E' around 1986/87 and the emergence of the Acid House scene, the mood began to change. Reflecting in 1990, Dermo explains, "it used to be all football and violence but now it's chilled."

Local heroes The Stone Roses were becoming a force to be reckoned with in popular music, bands like James were finally getting noticed after many years of trying, shops like Eastern Bloc on Oldham Street become the place to hang out during the day and then the Thunderdome on Oldham Road at night, listening to tunes and being seen. Often fuelled on drugs, alliances were made, many of which remain to this day.

These factors, mixed with a healthy dollop of punk DIY attitude, led to the formation of many bands, supported by their mates, their families, and with a desire to do something different, to tell the truth, to make people sit up and take notice.

Six months on from their first practice in February, Northside recorded their first demos in August at The Cutting Rooms, part of Abraham Moss College. These received regular plays on the show hosted by Tony the Greek's on Piccadilly Radio, as well as Craig Cash on KFM, Stockport.

With their popularity growing, the band made their debut live performance at Manchester's Boardwalk venue on September, which sold out by word of mouth. Not long afterwards the band received a visitor at their practice rooms, Tony Wilson (no 'Anthony H' back then), who offered them a recording contract. After agreeing in principle they were given a lift home in his Jag!

By the end of 1989 the band had played a now legendary gig with Happy Mondays at Manchester's Free Trade Hall (18 November) and the Haçienda Christmas Party (17 December, with support from Paris Angels). A deal with Factory was formalised in February 1990. They even managed to change guitarists along the way with Timmy Walsh (another Red) replacing Upo.

March 1990 saw the celebrated Granada Television documentary Madchester - The Sound of The North hit the screen. The programme featured a lengthy profile on Northside, and gave people a hint of what was to come, with a live performance of My Rising Star ("the first love song we've wrote") at Holland Street Sports Centre, Miles Platting.

Meanwhile in April the band headed off to London to record their debut single, produced by Ian Broudie (of Lightning Seeds and Three Lions fame).

Upon their return, with the Strangeways prison riot in full swing, Northside found their home town besieged by the media. More personally, a close friend of the band, Robo died in tragic circumstances, less than a year after Dermo's brother Steven, who'd named the band. The debut single was dedicated to them.

Answers Come In Dreams

In an unsurprising move, perhaps characteristic of the label, the first single Shall We Take A Trip was released on 2 June 1990 and promptly banned from daytime radio and several High Street stores due to its numerous drug references - with an opening line of 'L-S-D' would you really have expected otherwise? It reached 50 on the national chart.

A double A-side, Moody Places had been and band's choice for the lead track. Both songs were picked up by local television for use on Granada Soccer Night, where it would remain a fixture for the next two years on Wednesdays and Sundays.

The single boasted a sleeve by Central Station Design and featured a plum (yes, a plum, not an apple!) which was to become synonymous with the band's image. A 7" version was produced but never made it past the promo stage, the majority of these being used as frisbees from the high rises of the local Miners Estate.

A video was produced, taken from an appearance at the Haçienda (which had been originally broadcast on Granada TV a month earlier). Again, in a typical move by Factory, the version of the song on the film was faster than the single, so they slowed it down.

The band built up a loyal live following throughout the early months of 1990, as their songs, influenced by reggae, punk, and psychedelia blossomed. The band headed off abroad, playing gigs in Europe, Japan and America - the latter including three nights at the New Music Seminar in New York. France was perhaps the most notable place at the time, on the first trip to Paris the group found themselves playing next to the Moulin Rouge and had to soundcheck in the morning so not to disturb the exotic dancers. On the second a passport was lost following a visit to the Midem music festival, which resulted in band and entourage being held at gun point.

To capture the youth and energy of the band, they were quickly put in the studio with future Baddiel and Skinner collaborator and Lightning Seed, Ian Broudie at the helm. Aided by engineer Cenzo Townsend, the album was recorded at The Windings and Amazon, both in Liverpool, and Rockfield in Monmouth whose visitor book was signed by such luminaries as Black Sabbath, Iggy Pop and Paul Weller.

Do You Have A Dog?

expectations were high, and following a successful UK tour (supported by hand picked local acts), second single My Rising Star was released (on 7", 12" and CD) in late October 1990. MSR broke into the Top 40 at 32, and came with a video filmed on top of Manchester's Arndale Centre which featured a cameo from the local police helicopter.

The sleeve, again designed by Central Station, this time did feature an apple.

The band were invited to open the first night of the Great British Music Weekend in January 1991 at Wembley Arena, broadcast live over three nights on Radio One. Despite pleas from the station not to play their first single, Shall We Take A Trip, the band started with this number, causing the station to stop its live broadcast for several minutes. Curiously the band had opened an 'In Concert' programme from Sheffield University for the station with the same track a couple of months earlier without being censored. However, this incident did not stop the station allowing the band to perform a live set for Mark Radcliffe's 'Hit The North' BBC Radio 5 show.

Gonna Blow Your Mind

A third single, Take 5 (released on 7", 12" and CD) hit the UK Charts on 1 June 1991, the same day that the band played with Happy Mondays, The Farm and the La's at Elland Road stadium, Leeds and were named by many, including the music monthlies, as the highlight of the day.

Perhaps disappointingly, rather than keeping with the fruit theme (a Warhol banana pastiche maybe?) the Central Station cover art this time featured a shot of a plastic motorcyclist on the front, and - bizarrely - a windmill on the reverse. Who knows what it means? Only Matt and Pat.

With the "64-46-BMW" refrain lifted from Reggae super star Yellowman's Nobody Move, Take 5 was well received, but due to a barcode mix-up the boys were cruelly robbed of a higher chart position on its first week, entering at 41. By way of an apology the band were invited to make their Top of the Pops debut, Despite being outside of the Top 40 (the first band to ever be given the honour).

Released simultaneously by Geffen in the States, Take 5 was one of the last British pop songs to perform well on the American modern rock radio stations before they were taken over by home grown grunge. A 'fourth' single, Tour De World, would later be lifted from the album and released only in the US.

Take 5 also reached No 1 in Canada, before being deposed by future grunge anthem Smells Like Teen Spirit.

What Goes Up, Must Come Down

The band were on a high, but then the backlash started.

Chicken Rhythms was released on 17 June 1991. The iffy cover art for the album (again by Central Station) was produced using children's birthday cards, with photos of the bands heads imposed on the top. Possibly it didn't help the band's image, while the inner sleeve (along with the album title) was the work of Dermo's younger brother Dean, then aged just 16.

Despite reaching the Top 20, the album received mixed reviews in the UK, although Q magazine called it "surprisingly durable", while some American papers awarded it received more stars than Nevermind by Nirvana, released that same month.

But Time's Not Standing Still

After touring the album and making a lot more friends along the way Northside entered the studio to record their second album, and plotted a fourth single, Want A Virgin (Cool Idea). Demos were recorded throughout 1992.

Sadly, both single (designated Fac 338) and album remain unreleased to this day due to the well-documented demise of Factory Records. Had it appeared, the second album would probably have seen the band reach a wider audience, with a harder sound, but that's for another day.

Now, ten years after Britpop aid the American Invasion to rest, it's worth listening to Chicken Rhythms again. Long deleted, it has become a cult classic.

So enjoy this forgotten gem.

Iain Key
June 2005

Just Work (1999)

Written when I was at 192... funny really reading this over 20 years later as it was one of the most enjoyable jobs I ever had... I guess on this day I really must have been having a bad day...


Just Work

I hate my job.

I sit, everyday, wishing I wasn’t so fucking lazy, wishing I could get motivated, wishing I could break out of the fucking rut I’m in.

I hate my job.

My mind wanders, remembering what I’ve done, where I’ve been, what I’ve seen. I wonder how the fuck I’ve ended up here.

I hate my job.

I look at the screen as the call comes in, I adjust my position and spread my hands over the keyboard.

‘…which name please.’

 A nasal sounding North Manchester accent cut in. ‘It’s Jimmy’s mate.’

‘In which town.’

 ‘It’s Jimmy’s’

‘Jimmy’s in which town please,’ I close my eyes and curse in my mind, I need to get out.

 ‘Jimmy’s mate, on the main road.’

‘Yeah, but which town?’

 ‘Jimmy’s mate, in Failsworth.’

I breathe a sigh of relief, ‘Failsworth, thank you.’ I enter the information and watch the computer carry out its search. No trace, ‘Sorry I’ve got nothing called Jimmys in Failsworth.’

 ‘What? You must, it’s Jimmy’s, Jimmy’s Off Licence, on the main road, opposite the pub. He’s been there years you must have the number.’

‘Sorry, there’s nothing called Jimmy’s listed.’

 ‘No mate, its not called Jimmy’s, it’s where Jimmy works.’

‘I need the name of the off licence, not the name of who works there.’

 ‘Come on it’s Jimmy’s. Everyone knows Jimmy. It’s Jimmy’s Off Licence on the fucking main road. You must know Jimmy mate.’

‘Sorry I don’t. I need the name of the off licence if you want the number.’

 ‘Listen, I need me gear. Jimmy’s got it. Call him for me and tell him I’ll be round at 4.’

I’m trying to keep calm, not to swear, you never know who may be listening. ‘Mate, this is directory enquiries, if you want a number I need the name of the shop to be able to find it.’

 ‘You don’t know Jimmy? Fuck I thought everyone knew Jimmy.’

‘Do you know the name of the Off Licence.’

 ‘Oh mate, if I fucking knew I would have told ya. It’s Jimmy’s.’

I’m bored now. It isn’t funny anymore. I cut him off.


‘…which name please.’

 ‘TSB, Bury.’

At last, an easy one. ‘TSB, Bury. Thank you.’ I find the number and send it off to the automatic voice. It’s nearly time for my dinner break.


‘…which name please.’

   ‘Hello?’ (The voice was old, a woman).

‘Directories, which name please.’

 ‘Is that directories?’

‘Yes this is directories?’ (Oh God here we go).

 ‘Where you get phone numbers?’

‘Yes, which name please?’

 ‘What my name?’

‘No the name you’re looking for.’

 ‘Oh, I’m not really sure.’

‘Is it business or residential?’

 ‘It’s where I get my gas from.’

‘British Gas?’

 ‘Is that where I get my gas from love?’

‘It will be. Which department is it you’re looking for?’

 ‘I’m not sure.’

‘Is it about you’re account.’

 ‘Oh no, it’s about my gas bill.’

I’m so tempted to get rid of her on the automatic voice. I consider it, seriously consider it but then decide it wouldn’t be fair, I imagine it being my Mum or Dad calling in... ’right the number is…’

 ‘Hang on, I better put my glasses on,’ I hear her fumbling around, ‘OK love.’

‘It’s 0845…’

 ‘Oh wait a minute, don’t go too fast. 0845…’

‘55’

 ‘55’

‘55’

 ‘I’ve got that bit love.’

‘No, after the first 55, there is another 55.’

 ‘So it’s 55 and the 55. Is that it love?’
 
‘Double 0’

 ‘I don’t know if I can remember all that love. Let me get a pen and write it down.’

I smile...

 ‘I’ve got a pen now love.’

I should have been on my dinner 2 minutes ago. ‘OK, it’s 0845’

 ‘0845’

‘Double 5’

 ‘Double 5’

‘Double 5’

 ‘Double 5, this is where I got mixed up wasn’t it love?’
 
I laugh, but I need a break, I need a drink, ‘Double 0.’  

 ‘Double 0, is that it love?’

‘It is.’

 ‘Oh thank you love, I’m 73 and I’m on my own. You’ve been very kind.’

‘Don’t worry,’ I can’t be annoyed, ‘are you sure you got the number OK.’

 ‘I’ll read it back to you. 0..8..4..5...55..55..00.’

‘That’s it.’

 ‘Oh bless you love, my Arthur used to deal with all this but he died last year. Sometimes I get all muddled and don’t know what I’m doing.’

‘Are you OK now though?’

 ‘I am love, you have a nice day.’

‘I will, thank you.’

And with that she was gone. I made her happy, just by treating her like a human being instead of another number or another name. I feel like such a twat, even thinking I should get rid of the call...

Maybe I need a change.

I unplug from my position and head to the lounge for a coffee, I need it.

Northside Interview - Big Issue (1995)

Interview for the Big Issue in 1995 for a gig that never happened

Not exactly sure why. It may have been something to do with one of our 'crew' having an altercation with a punter at the venue when we went to check it out a couple of weeks earlier

The Smiths - All Men Have Secrets (1995)

I think these are the earliest pieces I'd written after seeing an ad in the back of the NME a couple of years earlier asking for contributions to a book written by fans of The Smiths

They were published slightly after the Anthony H Wilson Interview but they were definately written a long time before

Long before having a computer I’d have written these in my best handwriting and posted them up to those putting it together... I’m sure they would have been pleased by the brevity of my submissions

The book was published in September 1995 by Virgin Books with a forward by the legendary John Peel

Tony Wilson Interview (1995)

Tony Wilson Interview

Originally for the 'Big Issue' - this is an interview I did with Anthony H Wilson back in 1995

It was republished on the Cerysmatic Factory website in November 2019 

https://cerysmatic.factoryrecords.org/2019/11/in-conversation-with-anthony-h-wilson.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=twitter&utm_campaign=Feed:+CerysmaticFactory+(Cerysmatic+Factory)&m=1

In conversation with Anthony H. Wilson by Iain Key

I think it's safe to say that everyone who ever came into contact with Tony has at least one
"Tony Wilson Story".

My Dad and I had season tickets in the South Stand at Old Trafford for many years about
6 rows behind where Tony and Oliver, or other friends would sit. Every game we'd watch
the players come out, the toss of the coin, the teams line up for kick-off. Then, normally,
within a couple of minutes of the match starting, Tony would arrive causing those on his
row to stand, and those around hm to strain to see past if anything of interest was happening.

Whilst making his entrance Tony would apologise, shake hands and wave, occasionally
I'd get a nod in my direction.

I think my Dad actually enjoyed having Tony sitting in our block as when he spoke about his
religion - Manchester United, he'd always mention the late arrival and wished that "the bugger
off Granada" would buy a watch and then with some irony comment "he's always on the TV,
never late for that...".

I'd then often then hear other people pick up the thread with the line, "that Tony Wilson...".

Ironically, my first meeting with Tony involved him being late as well. My friend, Ian, and
I were doing a project on Factory Records for college in early 1995 and we had invited to interview him.
We arrived at the time agreed, were shown into his office and then waiting for 2 hours.
He'd been at awards do in London the night before and had been delayed.

As with his late arrivals at Old Trafford though he was apologetic and very personable.

I transcribed the interview we did that day with the idea I could submit it to The Big Issue.
I ran it past Tony and he (politely) dismissed it as boring, pedestrian and nothing new, which
in fairness it was. It was the same story that anyone who knows the history of the label could relate.

Rather than tell me this over the phone or by letter though I was invited back into the Factory office and
Tony explained his feelings and suggested I try again. To assist me he lent me a couple of books, one
of interviews with politicians and one with musicians and artists and told me to read them and go back
to him on the afternoon of Monday 22nd May.

I remember being nervous when I arrived, I'd been given a second chance and I really didn't want to
blow it.

This interview was going to by an attempt to look beyond the caricature and break down some of the
perceptions people held, hence the limited questions about Factory or Factory Too (as it was then).

I still vividly remember sitting on the metal staircase just outside the office in Little Peter Street on a
warm spring afternoon with a dictaphone between us, being in the company of one of the most
charismatic individuals you could ever hope to meet.

I rushed home, on a high to listen to the recording, and was mortified to realise the batteries were dying
meaning that we sounded like chipmunks on helium. Not to be put off I soldiered on and transcribed
the piece, sending it back to Tony for approval.

It was nearly a month before I heard anything back due to Tony being away. What impressed me was
he'd not just read and approved what I'd sent, he'd been through it and made notes and changes
"to make sense of his rambling".

So that's my Tony Wilson story, rather than dismiss the first piece of work I'd offered, which would
have been the end of it, he gave me feedback, encouragement and and opportunity to produce the best
piece of work I could which was printed in the Big Issue in August 1995.

Nearly 25 years later I still feel blessed and proud to have had that opportunity.

- Iain Key, Stretford, November 2019



With a career in television, journalism and music spanning over 20 years Anthony H. Wilson, Granada
stalwart and co-founder of Factory Records, love him or hate him, is one of the most well known faces
in the North West.

He's a Manchester United and Eric Cantona fan and probably as close to a professional Mancunian
you'll find.

Monday 22nd May, the country is seeing its 2nd glimpse of summer and Manchester is not the dour,
gloomy city some would have you believe. Anthony Wilson is in a brilliant mood, despite the team
he's supported since a boy failing to hold onto either their League Championship or the F.A. Cup.

How disappointed were you?

I actually wasn't that disappointed the previous weekend because a) I think it's boring if we win
everything all the time and b) for me it was important for Eric’s myth. He won the League
Championship in 1991 in France, 1992 with those tosspots from Leeds and in '93 and '94 with
United. So you see it adds to the myth, the one year he wasn't playing he didn't win the League.

Poetic?

Yes, poetic, I didn't feel too bad but I did perceive they'd win at Wembley. I wasn't depressed by the
game, but I was depressed that Paul Ince who is fantastic had a shit game from beginning to end
and as far as I'm concerned we didn't actually get beat in either game .

We certainly didn't get beat by West Ham and it wasn't as if we actually got beat by Everton.
The result was down to Mr Southall and his do or die heroics, so yeah, I'm a bit pissed off.

So was the season a disaster?

No, having won the League twice, a wonderful achievement, and to have pushed Blackburn so far
without deserving to was great. My season was complete when Crystal Palace got relegated.

Why?

Everyone in the country seems to hate United but the level of hate and sheer nastiness from the
Crystal Palace supporters was sickening.

As you are such a well-known face in the North West and have such a strong personality, 
do you think it's fair to say people either love you or hate you?

I think it's something people don't talk about in the media, we're not national celebrities.
The easiest way to explain is if you ask people who Mike Neville is, 90% won't have heard of him.
Do you know who Mike Neville is?

No.

In one fairly significant area of Great Britain, the North East, he is bigger than the Pope. He's
been the local TV presenter for years and years, and he's bigger than the Pope, George Michael and
Elvis rolled into one.

That’s what happens with regional TV presenters to a greater or lesser degree. I've been at
Granada for 20 years and it’s a strange phenomenon that people are aware of me because of my
personality. In 1973 I did a feature for Granada with Emmylou Harris and I asked her to do a song
she'd recently recorded by Gram Parsons. Anyway she couldn't but that night at the Manchester
Free Trade Hall she said "I'm going to do a song now for a nice young man I met this afternoon called
Tony Wilson", almost immediately 2000 people stood up and shouted 'WANKER!'.

Par for the course really but I think it ruined her concentration. So yeah, it goes with the territory really.

Have you ever been misunderstood?

Liverpudlians have a problem with me. These people at the end of the M62 think I have a problem with
Liverpool, I love Liverpool. To be honest I don't think they've ever forgotten or forgiven me for the
Brugge rosette.

What was that?

Liverpool were playing Brugge in the Semi Final of the European Cup, this is years ago, and I
was told that under no circumstances was I to mention that night’s game. So I didn't, I just wore this
fucking great white Brugge rosette.

Do you ever get worried about over exposure?

No, I do 4, 13-week series a year for Granada and it's up to them when they show them. Do you think
I'm on TV too much?

Sometimes.

I don't think I'm on enough. I'm a red light junkie. I work my bollocks off and I think I should be on
more often.

With working at Granada and also running Factory Too, do you find it difficult to split your time 
between the two?

No, I don't really, at Granada I'm a hired hand, a journalist and I work for them. It can be difficult
because I do a lot of travelling, but at Factory though I'm only~~ ;!lking head\A and I've got a great
team of people working with me.

Do you get a greater satisfaction from one over the other?

No (pause). It's a strange thing but I still see journalism as a craft, like being a plumber or a carpenter.
I served my apprenticeship to do this job.

Moving on to Factory and music, in a recent article in VOX you drew parallels between 
'No One Here Gets Out Alive' and Deborah Curtis's book about Ian and Joy Division. 
Do you think there will be a Doors type 'Joy Division revival' ?

I think, yes, to a degree, what is happening in the media - there is a generation that has come of age
who understand the importance of and significance of Joy Division. I really thought that Paul (Morley)
would write the book. Yes, there will be a degree of a revival.

Do you think it's a good thing that the book has been written?

Oh yes, the more books the merrier, but I think the book is a little short really.

It seems to be more 'pre-fame' than when things were happening.

Well yes, Debbie is telling her story and understandably it’s from that period. When a band, any band,
gets going it always happens that the wife is an outsider, a rock ‘n' roll casualty. I was thinking about
this the other day, the scene of the band travelling up and down the M1 in a transit, which is something
that most Manchester bands go through. The wives or girlfriends do feel shut out because that's a lads
thing.

Have you read the book yet?

Bits - from what I have read it's like 'Tony Wilson treated me like shit. I don't intentionally treat anyone
like shit but I can imagine what Debbie or anyone would feel. Until you get to playing Wembley Stadium
with the baby changing and hospitality suite next door - that's what's going to happen.

Do you ever get pissed off talking about Joy Division?

No, never, not at all. I'm still very surprised that I was fortunate enough to work with Joy Division.
It's exactly the same as walking down the corridor at Granada and this guy goes 'Hello Tony', what gets
me is do I call him Ken or Bill because you don't expect these mythical creatures, like Ken Barlow, to
talk to you. I feel the same way about Joy Division, a bit other-worldly but I feel very strongly that
people should know about it, and listen to the wonderful music.

Pete Waterman recently paid tribute to you over the 'In The City' festival, and you are revered by 
the music press. Are you the most important person in the music industry outside London? 

No, people see me for things like Factory; the Hacienda; and 'In The City' but yous ~ the Hacienda is
really Rob Gretton, 'In The City' is run by my girlfriend and partner Yvette Livesey, and Factory over the
years in general has been run by all the people who are a lot cleverer than me. as with all these things
I'm the 'talking head', the middle class wanker who went to Oxbridge and so I end up being the face of
all these things and people get confused, they think / I'm the face and therefore I must be the thing itself,
which I’m not.

With Factory it was Rob (Gretton) who thought of the idea. I thought we were just going to get our
bands signed to other labels. I get the credit for these things which is hard on everybody else.
It's all down to my face and lazy journalists

.

You are presently arranging a Computer Festival for 1998 to celebrate the creation of the 1st 
modern computer being developed in Manchester. Why?

It's absolutely essential. I have friends regularly coming across from America and they get the Wilson
tour of Manchester. First I take them to the Hacienda, then at 2 o'clock in the morning they get driven
past Foo Foo's to see 500 drunken post-menopausal women falling out of the club which they think is
amazing.

The next stop is the Daily Express building and then I take them to this unlit park in the middle of the
University, where no-one ever goes, and to this little alley and this little building with a plaque on the
wall that says "the world’s 1st computer ran here in 1948"; and then I laughingly point out that
Rutherford split the atom 2 doors down.

If this had been anywhere else in the world they'd have built a fucking theme park and have brass bands
playing. I'm a Salford lad and I didn't know 'til I was 31 that Manchester won the race ahead of
Teddington and Philadelphia.

So I think it's very nice, and important, for the people of Manchester to know that a) our city was the
scene for both the 1st and 2nd industrial revolutions and b} for the rest of the world to know. So we
should celebrate this.

Do you think Manchester underrates itself?

Yes, it's almost like this wonderful thing of not selling ourselves to anyone because we can't be bothered.
It's typically Mancunian just not to tell anyone. In fact United’s success over the years has been so overt
with the likes of Edwards, Law, Best, Charlton, Robson and Giggs that when we do get overt everyone
gets upset.

Yes, we underrate ourselves, but the opportunity to celebrate the computer is too good to miss.

Is there anything you'd still like to achieve?

Yes, loads (laughs). It seems you have music, TV, computers, so If you really wanted to achieve anything
or be involved in anything you can. People find it strange but I feel excited about every record I'm putting
out as I did with 'Transmission' or whatever. I've lots of ambitions, loads. One thing is a movie that was
being done with 2 very talented Geordies that would have been, and still will be, one of the best British
movies ever made. Before I die I want to see it made.

Is there anything you're glad you've never been asked?

Very good question (long pause). Yes, there are probably one or two things in my life that I'm
embarrassed about, but I'm not going to tell you.

I think you make mistakes and that's part of the process. One thing I hate being asked is "What would
you have on your gravestone?".

What would you have on your gravestone?

"The perfect client" as Ben Kelly, the architect calls me. Generally speaking I'll answer anything -
it's my day job. That's probably why people say I'm a bullshitter, this bizarre reputation I have which
I find insane, I wish I was.

--

Next time Tony Wilson is on your TV, don't switch channels, he may not be the man you think he is.

--

IN CONVERSATION WITH ANTHONY H. WILSON

QUESTIONS, INTERVIEW AND TRANSCRIPTION - IAIN KEY

MAY/JUNE NINETEEN NINETY-FIVE

--

Transcription and editing from original draft by John Cooper, 2019